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Posts Tagged ‘fbi’

For all of its stupidity, the music industry should be commended for relaxing its DRM requirements. Every single song on iTunes is DRM-free, as are the songs on Amazon MP3 and electronic music specialist Beatport

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What’s it going to take for PC game publishers to drop DRM altogether?

What do we know about Gaspar Llamazares? For a start, we know he’s a Spanish politician, a former Communist party member and leader of the leftist coalition Izquierda Unida. We know he has a Masters in Public Health from the University of Havana. We know he once attacked the Pope for his stance on contraception in the developing world.

And now, thanks to the FBI, we also know that he bears more than a passing resemblance to a 53-year-old Osama Bin Laden.

This most recent fact about Llamazares came to light his week when the bureau published a computer generated photograph of what Osama Bin Laden – 9/11 mastermind; cave-dweller; last remaining user of audio cassettes -  might look like today. The photograph, we were told, was produced using the FBI’s special digital aging software, the technical brilliance of which we could only dream about.

One is led to imagine gigantic whirring super-computers, surrounded by federal agents in white coats, feeding in old Bin Laden family snapshots, screen-grabs from his video messages; perhaps even trimmings from his beard. Then, when the miracle machines have done their week – after weeks of computation, burning through enough energy to light the whole of Holland – a printer whirs into life, rendering a single wanted poster-sized image. The current face of evil.

No wonder the bureau was proud of the photograph, posting it on their website and distributing it to the world’s media, from Minnesota to Madrid. And no wonder Izquierda Unida was shocked – no, terrified – when one of his friends pointed out that the resulting photo was his spitting image. What were the odds? A million to one? A billion?

Well, not quite.

In fact, as the FBI were later forced to admit, one of the things their super-computers aren’t very good at drawing is beards. Or hair. Or noses. Or faces, really. So the poor agent tasked with producing the image did what any of us would do when faced with an impending deadline and a multi-million dollar operating budget: he fired up his laptop, went to Google images, found a photo of someone who looked a bit Bin Laden-y, copied his features onto the photograph, added a few wrinkles and hit ‘print’. Unfortunately for all concerned, the face donor turned out to be a high profile Spanish politician – a politician who is now, quite rightly, worried that he’ll be lynched if he ever sets foot in the USA.

It goes without saying that the incident raises a couple of pretty serious questions. For a start, what precisely did the FBI agent type into Google image search to find someone with similar features to an older Bin Laden? ‘Sinister middle-aged guy’? ‘Swarthy foreigner’? Presumably not, as the former brings up a photo of Liam Neeson while the latter returns Borat. More worryingly if the FBI’s cutting-edge photo aging technology is nothing more than a kid with a laptop, an Internet connection and a copy of Microsoft Paint, then what else are they lying to us about?

It’s bad enough that we have the ‘CSI Effect‘ – the phenomenon, resulting from the popularity of TV shows like CSI, where the public and criminals have unrealistically high expectations of what crime-fighting technology is capable of. But TV shows are supposed to lie to us. Finding out that the government is playing the same game – massively exaggerating their technical abilities in order to give us comfort and to terrify our enemies – is just  weird. Particularly when they’re doing it using our tax money.

And so, in the interests of investigative journalism, I contacted TechCrunch’s source in the intelligence community (the same guy who got us hooked on Spymaster). I asked him, simply, “how much of the technology that we’re told is keeping us safe from evil-doers is in fact total bullshit – and how can we avoid falling foul of it like Gaspar Llamazares?”. His answers, given on the condition of total anonymity, make fascinating reading…

• Myth: New-style full body scanners at airports are capable of showing passengers naked

  Fact: Civil rights campaigners can relax. We’re told that the scanners’ operators are hidden away in a special room to protect our privacy – but according to our source, the reality behind the curtain – as with the Wizard of Oz – is far less exciting. There are no full-body scanners, just one very pervy dude watching CCTV and using his warped imagination to sketch the people he sees, sans clothes. Yes, it’s still freaky – but for an entirely different reason.

  How to avoid being unfairly caught: Be one of the Osmonds. No one wants to imagine the Osmonds naked.

• Myth: Electronic passports contain a tiny microchip which aids the detection of terrorists

  Fact: We’ve all stood at immigration while the TSA agent takes our passport and swipes it through their special scanner. But, with the monitor facing away from us, we’ve all wondered precisely what information is being displayed about us. Our police records? Details of where we’ve travelled? Perhaps our name is being checked against some kind of terrorist watch list (see below). Wrong on all counts. In fact the scanners simply are simply accessing our Facebook profile to check whether we’re friends with Osama Bin Laden. If no, welcome to America. If yes, next stop Cuba.

  How to avoid being unfairly caught: Don’t accept a friend request from Gaspar Llamazares.

• Myth: ‘No-fly’ lists ensure that known terrorists aren’t allowed to board planes to the US

  Fact: The FBI, NSA and CIA have all tried to build relationships with their foreign intelligence counterparts to build up an accurate list of international terrorists. Unfortunately, America’s aggressive foreign policy has driven much of the middle east into a sort of diplomatic sulk, with many Arab countries either refusing to pass on data or even occasionally creating fake names for their own amusement (the latter resulting in the arrest last month of Messrs ‘Pat Downe’ and ‘Ben Dover’ at Chicago O’Hare airport). In  fact the government’s current no-fly list was compiled simply by buying the subscription lists of ‘Jihad Monthly’, ‘Death To America! Digest’ and the Guardian.

  How to avoid being unfaily caught: Only buy your copy of Jihad Monthly at the newsstand.

• Myth: Specially trained dogs are capable of sniffing out explosives

  Fact: Bombs just happen to smell like Snausages.

  How to avoid being unfairly caught: Avoid smelling of Snausages. (Also a good tip for life generally)

Stay safe, America!

A couple times a year, the FBI reaches out to let us know about their latest social media tools in the war against the world’s most notorious criminals. Today, they’ve detailed some of the latest additions to their growing arsenal.

The first is a new Video Widget that allows users to embed the Bureau’s videos in their webpages and blogs. It’s a pretty standard widget, but the content is obviously more serious than your average YouTube video — and it could actually help catch a few bad guys. After you’ve embedded it, the widget will stay updated as the FBI uploads new content.

Next is a new Facebook Quiz on the FBI’s Facebook Page, which the Bureau describes as a “a light-hearted quiz to determine what kind of FBI career best suits you: Special agent? IT professional? Intelligence analyst? Even the FBI Director?” Quizzes can be kind of lame, but they’re a great way to engage a broad audience.

Finally, the FBI has detailed some of the updates that have been made to the free FBI Most Wanted iPhone application that was developed by NIC. The app features the FBI’s most wanted list, as well as breaking news related to missing children, children, and terrorism. The latest update to the app allows you to locate the nearest FBI office using geolocation. The FBI says that the application has now been downloaded over 670,000 times.

The FBI has actually been quite active on social media before now — they’ve previously launched a Most Wanted widget, and established profiles on Facebook, YouTube, and Twitter.

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Apparently it’s not okay to send West Virginia’s governor five free laptops. What a world! Governor Joe Manchin’s office got a nice four-pack of Compaq laptops earlier this month, followed a week later by a fifth machine from HP.

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Free laptops sent to government offices spurs FBI case

Please turn your attention to Rolling Stone, where an article about a blind, lonely phreaker is currently tearing up the charts. That is to say, it’s an article worth your time, and it’s certainly better than refreshing drudgereport.com for the thousandth time today.

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Do all your phreaking before you turn 18, kids

Are you ready for Windows 7? Remember, you need go out and get a really nice computer with a nice monitor and lots of hard drive space - basically you’re going to have to get a Mac

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Parallels Switch the Mac bundle lets you switch to Mac

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Confirmed: Motorola to unveil Android handset on September 10

Remember those wicked RE: The Darkside Chronicle Zombie tees that Capcom was giving away at Comic-Con earlier this year? We didn’t make it to San Diego either

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Contest: 5 Resident Evil: The Darkside Chronicles zombie tees

The FBI is willing to do just about anything when it comes to tracking down bad guys. They did the widgets thing last year. And today they announced that they’ve “set up shop in several social media websites.”

They’ve now got profiles on Facebook, Twitter and YouTube profiles are highlighted. They even have billboards up in Second Life. But nothing is mentioned about MySpace. Except that you can add FBI widgets to “social media websites such as Facebook, MySpace, and Blogger.”

Given all the attention the Attorneys General have given MySpace over the years you’d think it would be the first place they’d stake out and infiltrate. But as of now, they’ve got no official presence there. At least, none that they’ll admit to. A search on MySpace, after you work through the ridiculous advertising clutter, shows nothing.

Probably the only thing MySpace hates more than getting too much government attention is this - getting completely ignored while fast growing competitors get all the attention.

Update: From Jonathan Cox at the FBI - “We have a widget that works on MySpace, but nothing formal yet. Its a long vetting process and I have so many government rules to follow it would make your head spin. This is just the beginning though. I’ll keep you posted as things progress. Thanks.”

Crunch Network: CrunchBase the free database of technology companies, people, and investors

An Oklahoma City man named Daniel Knight Hayden, 52, posted threats against the government on Twitter under the name CitizenQuasar including the suggestion that he would kill police if they approached his home. The FBI has arrested him around April 15 in response to the threats, including a final tweet describing himself as “locked and loaded” and ready to “see what happens.” Oh, and he has a MySpace page, too.

Wired paints the picture of a zealot who might not have all of his screws tight.

“START THE KILLING NOW! I am willing to be the FIRST DEATH!,” read a tweet at 8:01 PM that day. “After I am killed on the Capitol Steps, like a REAL man, the rest of you will REMEMBER ME!!!,” he added five minutes later. Then: “Send the cops around. I will cut their heads off the heads and throw the[m] on the State Capitol steps.”